I’ll be honest. This week has really not been a good week for my family. We seem to be playing double jeopardy on the hospital Emergency Department visits. My PND has been flaring up again. Life just seems to be getting harder again.
Mum Still Not Home
Mum is still in hospital. I have no clue what is going on there. They’ve been playing around with her medication. One moment they’re discussing her heart. Then they’ve discussed her legs. Apparently they have officially “diagnosed” her with Restless Leg Syndrome. Ironically I had already told them she had it when she was first admitted last Friday. Go figure. She’s moved rooms three or four times, including to a whole new ward, and will still be staying this weekend while they do the finishing touches on her medication adjustments. Supposedly, they are trying to get it so she sleeps at night and is awake in the day. Whereas, currently, she is doing the opposite.
The double jeopardy comes in with having to rush Celine to the hospital ED with stomach pain on Tuesday afternoon. School phoned at 1:30 pm saying she had a sore stomach. After talking to Celine over the phone to determine how bad it was, I decided to pick her up. Once I got her home and sent her to bed with a heat pack. She started screaming before she could get into bed. I asked her what it felt like and she said it was like a hole in her tummy that felt like someone was digging out of.
I made sure it wasn’t a cramp. It wasn’t. She’d had one of those over the weekend so knew the difference. Her cries of pain were so bad that I gave her a couple of ibuprofen pills and called our doctor’s to discuss whether it was even worth bringing her there to see the doctor or if we should head straight to hospital. The decision was straight to hospital.
I phoned the school to notify them that I needed to pick up Blake early, bundled Celine & Isabella into the car, and picked up both Blake and Danielle early. We then headed to the hospital. Celine was virtually crying and screaming the whole way there. My hand got quite sore with the constant squeezing she did with the pain. About halfway to the hospital, the ibuprofen pills finally kicked in and she dozed off for 15 minutes.
Anyway, once at the hospital, they checked her out for everything, even infections. The ED doctor determined that the cause of the pain was constipation, of all things. Apparently, in lots of kids Celine’s age, it is quite common for them to start finding it hard to poo. The doctor said they get a lot of kids in for the same reason. The solution was simple. Plenty of water and fruit and a dose of lactulose morning and night.
I’m just grateful there wasn’t anything more serious. Dr Google was spouting things like ulcers and I was imagining appendicitis.
PND Flare Up
This week has caused a huge flare up of my postnatal depression. With Mum in hospital, I can’t do the things I normally do to get myself recentered in myself. Normally, I can take the dogs for a walk each day which gives me both fresh air and exercise. But since Isabella is at home with me and Mum isn’t home to look after her while I walk the dogs, I don’t get that hour to myself anymore. It also means that I’ve had the kids 24:7 the older three aren’t at school or kindy.
And yes, I know, I shouldn’t complain. This is the same situation that most mothers have on a normal basis. But still, not getting that hour to myself each day has triggered my PND again. And remember, I get the angry version of PND. Which is not pleasant for either myself or my children.
The first time it flared up this week, I ended up yelling at both Danielle and Isabella. I was frustrated that neither of them were going to sleep at bedtime and I ended up losing it. I hated myself that night and apologised to them the next morning. The second time it flared up, I could feel myself getting angry at the kids not doing what they were asked to do and decided to remove myself completely. I went and stood at the end of the drive for a while and just breathe. When I finally went back in, they still weren’t listening. So I went outside a second time. This time just to the garden.
I’m a little disappointed in myself in even having the flare ups even though I know that it can’t really be helped. I had been doing so well in managing it. Even to the point of not needing the medication that I was on anymore. But I guess, I can’t help the circumstances dealt to me.