4 Things I Wish My Mum Had Taught Me

I’m the youngest of four children. There are 10 years between myself and the next sibling up. By the time I came along, my “father” had left Mum to marry his mistress and Mum had stopped doing anything that reminded her of him while going through depression. Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not calling my Mum a failure at being a mother. Because she’s not. There are just a lot of life skills that my mother never taught me, that I simply wish she had.


I Wish Mum Had Taught Me How To Cook

The kitchen was not a place I was allowed to enter growing up and I was a teenager before I  even learnt how to use the microwave to heat up a mince pie or boil the jug to make 2 minute noodles when I got home after school for a snack. I didn’t actually learn how to cook properly until I started dating Eugene! Even now, 11.5 years later, my cooking skills can’t be classed as anything more than the basic homecook.

I Wish Mum Had Taught Me How To Bake

Now, Mum had taught me a couple of things as a teen. I could make a yummy pineapple or berry fruit pie. But this was another life skill that I never really learnt from my mother. It was Celine’s 3rd birthday before I successfully baked a birthday cake. Of course now, I can bake all sorts of yummy things and my baking skill is actually better than my cooking skill. And while I can now ask Mum for tips on unknown recipes that I’m trying out, I do wish I had learnt the skill when I was much younger.

I Wish My Mum Had Taught Me About Housework"amummyslifenz" "wish" "life skills" "life lessons"

Housework gave mum bad memories. She went from a long-term abusive relationship where she was beaten if the house was anything shy of spotless, to not having to answer to anyone. Housework was the cause of a couple of miscarriages in the past, so being pregnant with me, made Mum not interested in doing any of it.

It put her in a habit of only doing the basics. Doing the dishes when we started to run out. Washing the  dirty laundry when the basket started overflowing. I don’t even remember a vacuum or broom in her hand growing up. I was never made to clean my room growing up. Any nagging from my siblings just made my messy room state even more messy in my stubbornness. I was never made to do chores of any kind.

Again, it was only when I started dating Eugene, that I learnt the value of keeping a clean house. Now mess does my head in and agitates me if left too long.

I Wish Mum Had Taught Me About Budgeting

I knew nothing of finances growing up. We didn’t get a pocket allowance growing up. So I didn’t understand about the limitations of income vs expenses. Which is ironic considering by the time I arrived, Mum was a single parent, raising four children on a tiny benefit, with a mortgage to boot. Budgeting must have been a necessary skill to manage that.

My first experience with actual budgeting came after I quit a full-time job of two years to study for my Diploma in Administration. I went from a full income to a student allowance and had to quickly learn how to budget to manage expenses more suited to a full time job than a tiny student allowance without borrowing money from Mum.


All of which I am constantly trying to teach my own children the skills for. So that they don’t grow up lacking in those 4 specific life skills like I did. Mum taught me many wonderful skills. She was a wonderful mother. She just didn’t teach me those things that are so necessary for living a normal everyday life.

What is something that you wish your parents had taught you about life that they never did? Tell me in the comments below!


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About AMummysLife NZ

Mother of 4 children. Blogger about family life, recipes, product reviews and motherhood in general.

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2 Responses to 4 Things I Wish My Mum Had Taught Me

  1. Sheryl says:

    Great article, I really enjoyed reading it. I can relate to your story, my mother didn’t teach me either. However, my grandmother taught me some cooking and baking. She was a drill sergeant when it came to cleaning, but finances and budgeting were never addressed. So I learned the hard way, too. I wish I had been taught how to be strong and independent, how to make decisions and how to say no. It took many, many years on my own, to learn these. Thanks for sharing!

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