I’m not a celebrity. I don’t have a crew of physical trainers and chefs cooking for me to give me the perfect post pregnancy body. I’m just me. I didn’t work out all through my pregnancy or even much of after giving birth. I didn’t eat a perfect nutritious diet designed to help drop the fat off my body. I didn’t even jump into the 30 Day Shred like I did with the previous two post-pregnancy journeys. This will be my last post-pregnancy journey so I’m taking it a little easy. I’m not stressing as much about it as I have in the past where losing the baby weight fast was for some reason expected and if it wasn’t dropped immediately, there was something wrong!
With my first pregnancy, I didn’t care how big I was afterwards. Even the snide comments from my mother-in-law didn’t stress me out much although I did feel self-conscious about them. I had a happy healthy baby and I was content to breastfeed her and watch her grow. It wasn’t until she was 2.5 years old that I really started to feel concerned about my weight or size. To be more specific, it wasn’t until I had a miscarriage when we were trying for a second baby that made me start to focus on trying to lose weight. It took 9 months before we finally got pregnant with Blake.
This time I was more careful to eat right and exercise more consistently both during my pregnancy with Blake and after I gave birth to him. I was back to working out well before I was 6 weeks post-birth with him and by the time he was 6 months old, I was already pregnant with Danielle. So I did the same with her. Tried to eat right and get some exercise throughout the pregnancy and again after birth.
The whole process was stressful and nerve wracking. There was such pressure to be back to pre-pregnancy weight and size and fast. I didn’t want that this time around. When I fell pregnant with Isabella I took it easy. I didn’t stress over what I ate or whether I exercised enough. I just went with the flow. Afterwards, I did the same. It didn’t matter to me that I was of similar size and shape to when I had Celine and while I still felt the need to lose the weight fast I didn’t act on it as much. By the time I got to 5 months postpartum I still looked 5 months pregnant. And I was ok with that.
Now I’m 9 months postpartum. My body is still large. I still weigh far more than I should be or want to. My weight has fluctuated up and down like a yoyo. I didn’t try very hard to lose weight or get in shape and I wasn’t very consistent with it. So it’s no real surprise that I am pretty much the same size as I was at 5 months postpartum. And I’m OK with that. It is, after all, just a variation of normal.
I am taking it slowly to lose my weight and get back into shape. I have recently started taking the dogs for twice daily walks and even the occasional run. I’m not jumping into a strict diet or watching what I eat just yet however because my aim isn’t to drop the weight instantly but to do it slowly and in a controlled way. First I need to get my fitness level up. To tone my body first. To convert my fat into muscle. The weight will drop off when it’s ready to.
As I said, I am OK with how I look at the moment. I’m not happy with it but I am OK with it. It’s just part of the process. I won’t look this way forever. However, the most frustrating thing about how I look at the moment is my clothing. My clothes either give me a muffin top, a mummy apron or make me look pregnant. If not all 3 things at once. It can make it hard to feel confident about how I look especially since I’m limited in the clothes I can fit, mostly being maternity clothing. But again, I won’t look this way forever. I just want to take it slower than I have in the past.
This is a lifestyle change not a marathon.